


Easy Does It

by Anonymous



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Crack, M/M, Rarepair, Sylvain's an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:01:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23370610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Sylvain is bored and won't quit it
Relationships: Sylvain Jose Gautier/Hubert von Vestra
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20
Collections: Anonymous





	Easy Does It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [idanato](https://archiveofourown.org/users/idanato/gifts).



Sylvain was bored. The girls he’d been flirting with this week all hadn’t panned out, leaving Sylvain with an annoying, persistent itch he couldn't scratch. This was probably the longest he’d gone without a fuck since his pre-academy days. Usually, he cast a wide net, flirting with anyone and everyone he encountered — you never knew when you might get lucky. But Sylvain had actually really tried with those girls, concentrating his efforts and charm into wooing them. It didn’t matter in the long run, but he shouldn’t be alone in his room on a Saturday, like that Bernadetta girl (he'd tried flirting with her a few times, but was always left scratching his head).

Sylvain wasn’t sure why his reputation among the town girls was relevant at the academy, because there were plenty of students he had never tried chatting up, or never seriously. Off the top of his head, Dedue, Lorenz, Leonie, Hubert, and Ignatz. There was a pattern here. Although Sylvain liked guys too, the ones at Garreg Mach were pretty much no-go. His probing teases had never yielded anything, and he preferred to pick where the fruit was ripe.

But sometimes, Sylvain enjoyed a challenge. Hadn’t that been why he’d so persistently chased after those girls? The victory became that much sweeter. And when one path didn’t work, try another, right? Sylvain was getting invested in this idea. It was actually sort of hot.

Sylvain made his way to the dining hall, scouting the scene before him. Hmm, there was Dedue. A long shot, even for him, but where did anyone ever get without trying?

“What’s up, Dedue? How are you doing on this fine Saturday?” Sylvain gave his most winning smile.

Dedue looked up, expression unchanged.

“Good morning, Sylvain.”

Damn, how was he going to flirt with people who didn’t even have the radar for it? He tried again.

“What are you up to today? I heard a new merchant was in town. Did you..." he paused suggestively, "see anything you like?”

“I am eating breakfast.”

“…That’s cool, that’s cool. If you want to head there later, just hit me up!”

Dedue nodded, then returned to finishing his soup.

Oh wait — he spotted Dorothea, Edelgard and Ingrid. Sylvain couldn’t resist stopping by and telling them how lovely they looked.

“Good morning, ladies. Ingrid, you look as ravishing as ever. Seeing all of your beautiful faces is the highlight of my day.”

“Did your date not work out, Sylvain?” Ingrid raised an eyebrow. Dorothea laughed.

“What makes you say that?” He made a show of being wounded. “As a matter of fact, I had a wonderful night with my date. I just wanted to give a compliment to my friends.”

A noise caught his attention. Hubert had been sitting there this whole time, undetected. He was glaring at Sylvain.

“Talk of your — forgive me, _pursuits_ — is not welcome here. Or anywhere.”

“Lighten up, Hubert! Y’ know, I wouldn’t mind talking about _your_ pursuits with _you_.”

Hubert froze mid-sneer. A vein bulged on his neck. Sylvain briefly wondered if Hubert had ever had any sorts of sexual exploits before, or romantic for that matter. He doubted it.

The girls had fallen silent, watching the scene unfold. Dorothea spoke up at length.

“It’s alright, Hubie.” She patted his arm comfortingly. “Not everyone has the same experiences.”

Hubert was a volcano about to explode. And Sylvain knew that when he did, it would all come raining down on him.

“Haha… I’ll catch you ladies later!” He bolted out of the dining hall.

Sheesh, couldn’t he catch a break around here? Sylvain looked around despondently, plopping down on a bench with a sigh. It was looking like he wouldn’t get any this weekend, either.

Sylvain backed up under a sudden ominous presence looming over him.

“You.”

Hubert was standing groin-level in front of him, and when Sylvain looked up, was majorly pissed.

“Whoa, Hubert —”

“I do not appreciate your words at the dining hall. I don’t care what you may get up to in your own time, but do not ever try to drag me, or Lady Edelgard into it.”

Sheesh. Who was Hubert to tell him what he should or shouldn’t do?

“Aw Hubert, are you mad because you wanted a compliment too?”

To Sylvain’s surprise, the tips of Hubert’s ears turned red. Holy shit! Had he actually been missing out big time?

Sylvain's easy smile returned, confident again. Hubert wasn’t bad-looking by far. A little brooding and intense at times, maybe. But he could work with that.

“You’re an interesting man, Hubert. I really think that!”

Hubert had gone completely still.

“Say what. Next time you need a little love advice, come to me. I’m always available!” Sylvain winked as Hubert stormed away.

Some things you had to take slow. Or as slow as one could.


End file.
